Featured

Confused or Passionate?

Today I am writing this yet another blog based on my experience, actually more like based on me. I’m going to write about my uncertainty, my nervousness, my lack of clarity. I am writing this because I feel that someone, somewhere needs to know this and get inspired. Someone, somewhere is probably going through similar feelings or worst and can heave a sigh of relief knowing that they aren’t alone.

I am writing this because I feel that someone, somewhere needs to know this and get inspired.

If you have read my previous blogs, you would know, I was a clueless teenager who didn’t know what to do ahead in life. Psychology came into my life and I felt, ”Oh, this is what I want to do.” I did that for a while. Then some unwanted accidents happened and I took a break from the job. During that time, I discovered acting. I got lucky to be part of a theatre group and felt, ”Oh, this is what I love to do.” And pursued it while working, thinking I was a counselor, but got more involved with marketing and social media.

I then happened to do a job that required me to do something similar to sales and events so I got more involved in that while continuing to do theatre and all this while I had my writing going on. I wrote blogs, I wrote poems, I wrote and wrote and each time I read my poems, old ones, new ones, my blogs, I figured I loved writing.

In between all this chaos, during the lockdown, I discovered sketching. I started sketching and I sketch sometimes and let the inner chaos out on the paper. At this point, while I pen this blog, I am trying to improve my writing skills, be better at it while I use my poems on my social media to help get connected to people, touch their souls, give them the ”awww” moments and relive those memories.

I wrote blogs, I wrote poems, I wrote and wrote and each time I read my poems, old ones, new ones, my blogs, I figured I loved writing.

Today, I am jobless, I left it for some personal and family related stuff, and I decided while I did that, I will make my writing also equally important and someone, somewhere will connect with me and want to listen to more of my writings. I haven’t totally met those expectations, and I am not losing hope on it either.

My point being, I have my meltdowns. I have my lows where I feel like a total loser who doesn’t have a job. I feel like I am not career oriented because I like so much at the same time. I want to do so much together. I am 29, and I don’t have stability in my life when it comes to what is it that I really want to do? Some of you can imagine how terrible these lows can be, some of you might think this is a waste of time, and some of you want to reach out to me with your sympathies.

Hold that thought. I want to also show you the brighter side of my life. When I am the good listener, and help someone vent out and help them in finding a perspective, I win. When I perform on that stage and get applauds, I win. When I publish my poem amongst many talented poets and have my name on a printed book, I win. When I have you all smile while reading my blogs, I win. So is it that bad?

I have my lows where I feel like a total loser who doesn’t have a job.

I feel like I am confused sometimes, but then the creative side of me, consoles me and I feel like I am just a person who is too passionate. I like to do all those things. I like to be content with my content. Yes, I am lame (sometimes), but mostly I am smart and sarcastic and a person who learned the importance of Self-love the hard way. Trust me, Self-love is best love and everyone can love themselves.

I saw my mother working for 40 years in the same job, I learned that being independent and earning money was important. So, I never felt ok with the thought of not having a job. I then fell in love. I saw that the person I love needs my help in his business, so I took a leap of faith to join his business. I thought in my head several times that this could be my chance to explore and try being an Entrepreneur. With this lockdown and the ongoing pandemic, I am stuck somewhere between entrepreneur and jobless.

Self-love is Best Love.

On some days, I cry, on some days, I am angry. On some days, I am aggressive and don’t care and on some days, I am motivated to accomplish. I don’t know whether I like the business I have joined. I have several thoughts like will I do justice to the person I gave hope. Will I do justice to myself for doing something like this at the cost of leaving a job that gave me financial stability? Will I ever be able to ace in one single thing rather than doing so much together?

It is chaotic, exhausting and tiring. It is also exciting and maybe a new learning experience awaits. I feel lucky that there are so many things that give me happiness. So many ways that I get to reach out to several people and souls. I can understand people, read through them and express what most people find difficult to in several ways. I am passionate about many things. If you can relate to bits and pieces or completely to everything that I have said so far, you my friend are not alone. I am here with you.

I feel lucky that there are so many things that give me happiness.

I am learning that I am not one of those who are part of a race. I am also not one of those who lose the race. I am that person you look at, when you either win a race (for a cheer), or lose a race (for an appreciation for the efforts.) I am the many people who can mould myself into whatever life brings at me, while still feeling the happiness of doing all this together. I also know that I am not alone. There are so many of you feeling this, so many of you who go through this. Well, I read a very good line today just before I started writing this blog. It’s almost like the Universe sent it to me. It said, ”Honor Certainty. It’s the womb from which all-knowingness comes.”

I am going to absolutely Honor the uncertainties of my life. Continue spreading love and light to all of you through my blogs. Share my life experiences and help you feel not alone. Yes, You are not alone my lovelies. The battle between confusion and passion shall be a long one. Let’s not give up so soon or actually never! Shine and enjoy your uncertainties and feelings and acknowledge them. Love yourself the most. Until next time…

Image courtsey: Pixabay

Featured

The Child You Forgot.

img_202870554124126

 

We all tend to remember our childhood only when such days come to light… 14th November – Children’s day. Firstly Happy children’s day to all the adults who have hidden their inner child in tha face of adults. Try exploring and bringing that child out today.

All of us in the struggle of living and surviving the competitions of life, forget to laugh unnecessarily, forget to run around in the first rains, forget to jump to express happiness and forget to remember that child who is so lively.. Each one of us will always have our inner child and all you have to do is embrace it and enjoy it. Children enjoy everything right from walking among the crowds to sitting alone. That’s because for them everything is a new experience and there are no rights or wrongs and specially no over thinking about what he/she or the world would think of them.

Today we all would generally remember our childhood and memories. But hey, why not create new memories today by bringing your inner child out.. Let’s all do what the child within us wants to do… Sit on the swings, play with balloons, go to beach and drench yourself, play with the sand or mud, binge eat ice cream and chocolates, go to a fair or a playzone and for a change you be the one playing those games.. Hang out with friends and play games like hide and seek and don’t cheat….

Create memories that fulfill you and give you happiness. For once do something that your heart approves of and not your mind.. Shut away all the rights and wrongs and run against the crowd and feel the breeze across your face. Smile at all the unknown people and wear clothes you didn’t all this while thinking it would look kiddish. Tie your hair up or just let them loose.  Bring out the Child in you who like you just  got your vacations and each day is fun filled. Make each day memorable  because the Child in you deserves it. . .  Happy children’s  day today and forever . . .

To That Friend and friendship which is lost…

I don’t know if you are reading this, it has taken me a lot of over-thinking, tears, anger, love, missing and many deleted posts to be able to write this. I hope this reaches you when you need it the most. I say this because I write this today when I needed it the most to finally tell you everything that has gone amiss in these past few years.

I have spent every day since we lost touch thinking, going back to ‘our days’ and going through your social media posts. I know you know I stalk you sometimes, and it’s only because I miss you. These past few years may have been miserable for us, but I do know that I have missed having you beside me. Every friendship goes through this I guess. Even the best of friends drift apart.

Humans are bound to make mistakes, because if they were perfect, they’d be machines. I know I am way too much human when it comes to this. I make mistakes, I don’t take initiatives, I don’t think rationally when I get panicky, and you can blame this on my zodiac (makes me feel better :P) I am everything and yet I can’t stop loving people. Just the same way I haven’t stopped loving you.

The situations now may be worst I know. There might be indifference instead of anger, I know. I still am hoping to publish this post and not delete it like the 100 others which I did. I don’t expect a dramatic turn in our relationship. Yes, I and you are still in a relationship which is beyond all bonds. This friendship may be lost, but in my heart it is still a relationship that you and I share.

Your laughter, your voice, your cooking, your shouting, your anger, your love, your care, your tears, your hugs, everything is still fresh in my heart and mind. I can still relive each moment that we have spent together as it is. Be it the first time we met, the first time we cooked in my home, every time you cooked for me, the first time I ran to you crying, the first time we stalked a crush, our random celebrations, our venting out sessions over ice-creams and pastas, our adventures, our series obsessions, our dozing off moments, every moment is as it is and it is beautiful. I want you to know that I have loved you always and even though there is distance, it will never change the love I have for you.

You would know how bad I am at expressing, and you would know how I am fond of writing and expressing, so this may be the longest time I have taken to write to someone, or for someone but it is here finally. I know it may sound unreal, there would be a lot of ”why’s” and ”How’s” and ”what’s” in your head. Trust me, this is only to let you know that you are an amazing soul and people who are friends with you are really lucky. I can say because I know and I had the chance to be one. This is only to let you know that I will cherish every memory I have with you. I will always have the love for you.

I have lost a lot of people in my life, I have seen a lot of people lose their loved ones. I am witnessing my parents getting old. I have seen too many losses and unpredictable situations. Which is why I feel the need to do this. Before it is too late because I know it is too late. So I really hope and pray that you know who you are and while you read this you smile (although I know you would be angry) but smile really because life is so unpredictable at this stage and I can’t let this expression not reach you.

To everyone else who is reading this, take your moments. Express the way suits you best. Because when life brings tough situations, friends are the only source of happiness and peace. Reach out to that friend who is lost, tell them what’s in your heart and feel the light in your soul enlighten. It will make you laugh, smile, cry and angry all at the same time. It will also give you a relief that is equal to how you feel when you hug your mom. I felt it. Hope you did too.

The Art of Speaking Up…Afterall

The most popular definition of Speaking up is to speak loudly. The second line of the definition is where the real meaning is hidden. It goes like this, ” to express an opinion freely. ” Well, If it is always going to be portrayed as Speaking aloud, most people will never speak up. While some may still do, it will be regarded as disrespectful, arrogant and unwanted.

Since childhood this society teaches us to keep quiet. Be it the feelings, desires, or even the truth. The process of keeping quiet continues while we grow up to adulthood. Some of us have been lucky to grow up in an environment where we have full liberty to speak up and speak our mind. Generally, the fact that someone is speaking up does not go down well with everyone.

Speaking up is an art just like listening, reading, communication, and well, living. Often it is observed that speaking up has been associated with being arrogant or ”too outward.” This then leads to character assassination.

It takes a large amount of courage, many failed attempts, setbacks, and outbursts to finally speak up. I remember, as a child, I used to be very silent. This lead to me suffering from severe outbursts of anger and tantrums. I could not understand why I did what I did. I then started writing, and it became my art of speaking up. I would write, read it and go through emotional growth. Each of us has a way of speaking up and mostly people find it unacceptable.

Reflection has taught me so many things about myself as a child. Just recently, me and my family were sitting together and talking about childhood, and I realized that merely because of my lack of ability to speak up, I was bullied. As a child, I didn’t realize this, I still went up to those so called friends. I would innocently end up doing whatever they asked me to.

A game of hide and seek was terror for me, because I was fat, somehow I was the one always looking for the hidden friends, and well, they would run off to the shops, eat ice creams and I would keep looking for them. So anyway, this isn’t about how horrible my childhood was, this is about how if then I would have spoken up, I would not have suffered as much today.

What happened to me then, happens to a lot of us even today. The names change, but it all is one. You don’t speak up, you are considered as submissive, and of course someone on whom you can inflict pain. It leads to dangerous levels of anger built up, dangerous levels of inferiority and dangerous levels of severe personality damage.

I may not be the best person to write this article, because I myself am still learning to speak up. My writings speak a thousand words though. But honestly that wouldn’t be enough. I have sarcasm also to my rescue, but that itself is such a misunderstood and not a very largely welcomed way of speaking up. I think I developed sarcasm as a defense mechanism against all those bullies who I failed to recognize even when I grew up.

Now the problem with sarcasm is you find yourself on the other side of the story. You become the bully and you become highly misunderstood. I am not saying using sarcasm was the best choice, having said that, I use it with my sense of humour and often people find it amusing.

It’s a long journey towards speaking up in the most accepted manner. Imagine since childhood you are continuously right handed, and then suddenly you grew up, and start using your left hand. Yes, you will get the looks from people. Yes, you will face failure or unsuccessful attempts. You will indeed lose it sometimes and want to use your right hand because that is where your comfort zone lies.

I am learning at every stage of my life. I write, I speak up and I also sometimes speak loudly. Yeah, most of you must have understood the reason for me writing the previous line. The next time you feel like saying something, say it. Express yourself, be it a mere sound, a text, a verbal communication, any form that suites you, just choose to express.

Image Courtesy: Society 6

Life @ 91Springboard

Let’s start this one with a fact. The term ”Coworking” was coined by Bernard Dekoven. I was not aware of the concept, the style, the actuals of what is a Coworking until I applied for this job at 91Springboard. I have always been someone who gets way to attached to their company and when I left my previous company, it felt like everything was falling apart.

So when I applied for this job, I had no hopes and I remember I was in Nasik sitting alone in the balcony fearing what my life was going to be without a job. That’s when I got a call from 91Springboard.

The term ”Coworking” was coined by Bernard Dekoven.

At first I didn’t know the where, what and how of it. I searched and went through several websites and read about the Coworking industry. Even then as they say, you learn it while you are at it. So I stepped into my office on my first day and I found notes, drawings and messages that welcomed me. I was shocked, because never before was I welcomed so warmly and heartily.

Even today, I remember every minute of my first day spent at my office. The journey since then has been one an ongoing learning lesson which has its own curves. I started becoming aware of so many new terms (for me) and so many technical words. I also started understanding that work life can be so much fun too. I started learning how to solve issues with regards to internet, basic necessities and overall structure. I understood the various companies and categories of start ups. I met so many people who in their own way have taught me so much in life.

I was shocked, because never before was I welcomed so warmly and heartily.

Every time I felt that I was going to fall or fail, I had a team to lift me up. A team that is transparent with each other. Always having each others’ back. A team that ate together, made fun of each other and when the time came, protected each other. I heard stories of politics within teams, but never experienced it (So Glad!!!) and we take absolute pride in it.

I met so many people who in their own way have taught me so much in life.

The secret behind such a team is no secret. It’s the Boss. The man who kept us all together. He hated when I first called him ”Sir” and since then we have been friends. Friends who don’t need to talk all the time, but that once in a while hello is enough to fill in the gap for so long. He stood up for us, he showed patience with us and ensured we learned from our mistakes, so never blasted on us. We did see his angry face once or twice but he would come back to us and explain his reasons.

Yes, that was my boss, who didn’t need to do all of this but yet he did. So now he has moved on to a higher position and left us all for the biggest learning. It wasn’t easy but I guess we all are still getting used to it.

The secret behind such a team is no secret. It’s the Boss.

So my point being, I complete 1 year in this organization on 25th of this month (September) and yes the cliché line comes up- It has been the best one year so far. It has been so because of the people. With the learning curve moving forward, I too shall have my share of ups and downs but at the end what matters is the learning. I know I am again getting attached to the company and people and this time I am very much aware of it. I know that some of these people will be in my life for the longest of time. So no regrets giving my heart to them and the space.

For everyone out there, who is struggling to find themselves in a new workplace, who is struggling to match the chord with your colleagues, who is struggling with their bosses, I just want to say, its only up to you how much you give them the control and how much you take on your stride. Find the balance and the struggles shall find themselves out. I have drifted away in this sea and drowned, I am now allowing myself drift as much as my legs can reach and I put my foot down once the drowning part gets real. If you feel this one is incomplete or doesn’t make sense, you can check out my blog which says ”Being your own Lifeguard” I hope that helps you.

For rest of you all, who have always been so supportive and read my blogs like I do, here’s showering loads of gratitude your way and I hope more light and power to every one of you. Cheers.. !!!

Image Courtesy: 91Springboard

Why I Am..How I Am

The first time I studied Psychology, I just felt like it was meant to be in my life. I had no clue whatsoever about what I wanted in life, what I wanted to do ahead, and what Psychology was as a subject. I knew one thing, that Science and Commerce were not my cup of tea. With the past record in school, I honestly had doubts of what I was going to be and thought the last resort was to become a maid. Yeah, shocking but true. My mom never lost hope in me though, she kept pushing me to do better.

So when I joined college (again shocking but true) I started studying many subjects and among those was Psychology. You know how we under-rate something or someone and then realise that ”That is one heck of a thing/ person.” Ya Psychology was that for me. A lot of questions got answered when I started studying it. I understood myself a lot more. I understood behaviours a lot more. Trust me it’s never enough but helps you get going.

My mom never lost hope in me though, she kept pushing me to do better.

I graduated and then post graduated studying humans, behaviours, thoughts, mental health, and so much more that human beholds. I figured that I wanted to help people and make life better for others. I got so involved in helping people, understanding them to the core that if someone insulted me, I’d not get mad at them because I kind of understood what they did and why they did.(Miserable right!!!) Well no, I might have lost myself several times but I found something better too.

I started theatre, acting, writing, and then I understood that every profession that involved understanding people and their personalities as a whole, was what I got attracted to and aced (Mostly).

I might have lost myself several times but I found something better too.

I May not do more of counseling but I surely inculcate all that I have studied into every aspect of my life. I design my life and learnings based on the principles that made me a better person by accepting and evolving.

Imagine from being a frustratingly quiet child to now hosting events and excelling in sales, I surely turned my life 360 degrees. Ok, fine, 260 Degrees, but so close to 360 Degrees. And that difference is what keeps me alive because it requires me to learn and learn and learn new things so I could meet the difference someday.

Imagine from being a frustratingly quiet child to now hosting events and excelling in sales.

I do take pride in being able to convert leads in my professional life. I have often been asked why do I not do Counseling anymore, and I think the first two years that I did do counseling, I served the purpose. I did my dues and I shall continue to do so but not at a professional level. A personal level where no one is obliged to pay me, or come back to me. One conversation and they are gone, works for me.

I have this liking towards sales and marketing and content. So I know I may be too late but I have started pursuing that liking. During this lockdown, I did online courses and have started implementing them in my own ways. I have learnt so much in these past few years about myself. I grew up and became more emotionally stronger. I saw such situations where It didn’t happen to me, but felt so real and now I think I am mostly prepared for it.

So few paragraphs will never be enough to explain why I am.. how I am… but indeed for anyone out there who feels stuck, who feels lost, or who feels like this is not who they are… I hope this article reaches you and helps you in its own way for your betterment. I would like to end this with a quote I love and follow rigorously in my life.

”Learning Never Goes Out Of Style.”

Image Courtesy: Pixabay

Being Your Own Lifeguard

There is a chaos in the surrounding. There is a sound that fades in my ear. I cannot listen, but I hear these words murmured around me. This phase seems like the one that pulls me away and together with myself. The speed of the days passing by seem to move in slow motion around me. Just when I want to slow down, they spin off in a blink.

So much uncertainty surrounds me, so much unknown things hound me. For all I know, this moment feels like a day that chooses to never end. When it ends, it will be like a moment that never existed. Yet they choose to affect me, or rather I choose to let them affect me. Knowing that my happiness and my emotions lie in my hands, I struggle with these known unknown emotions.

They seem like they are mine, they have been within me for so long, they made their own comfort zone. All this happened and I let it happen too. So the real question is, how and when did I let these happen with me. Did they slide into me like how the water we gulp slides into our throat? Did they make it so obvious while sliding like a cough we feel while gulping down water? Did they resisted sliding in and I forced them in, like the warm water we resist but slide it down our throats?

This uncertainty has now started filing up beyond my breath. I feel restless and sometimes out of control, like a wave that forcefully takes me away with it. But like every lifeguard who jumps the gun to protect one, I gathered the courage and I picked up the phone to reach out to my lifeguard who I felt that in that moment would be best to calm me down.

He is not my someone I talk to everyday, he isn’t someone I meet everyday, he isn’t someone who knows me since many years, and yet he is my lifeguard in that moment.

You know that feeling when you have two best friends and both of them are suffering and you have no power over that situation because you are far, you are distanced and you cannot just be there for them. Both of them are going through these emotional turmoils and suddenly its all three of you. Because it suddenly starts feeling like this has happened to you too. It starts taking over your capability to answer questions, to think for them, to be able to be that person to whome they come to when they are going through tough times. It feels like decades have passed by, each day makes you feel that helplessness in its very extreme form.

You are drowning in that sea of people who don’t understand you, your situation and your feelings. You start putting a facade. Underneath that water you see the real you – helpless, unable to cry, not very helpful, and lost.

Then you gather all the oxygen, you take a deep breath and you go to the lifeguard asking him to save you from this drowning. He comes underneath the water with you, he breathes calmly and he shows you how to breath despite you knowing it, coz in that moment, maybe that’s all that you need. He knows you, and so he won’t just pull you out of the water, he teaches you to swim through these waves, holding onto yourself and reaching that shore. You learn, you learn and you learn and then again in a blink you drown, he doesn’t let go off you. He pulls you back to him, talks with his eyes and yet again, a calm serene feeling runs through your spine.

You slowly start swimming and take yourself to the shore. And when you turn back to thank him, he’s gone. He goes far away again to save someone else and restore faith in themselves. His voice echoes in your mind every time you feel like drowning again. His eyes speak out loud and help you to breathe into the moment. You know that you can run towards him any time and he will do is just be himself (saviour).

The chaos is still there around me, I still hear voices fading and this time I know I can be myself with my best friends. I know I can swim through with them in their tough waves and sea. I can be the lifeguard if they ever feel like drowning. I am with them and that’s all that matters.

If any of you reading this, have such feelings, please pick up the phone and dial the number you want to, because sometimes dialing is better than leaving the phone at loose. If you ever feel like drowning, remember to be your own lifeguard and swim through the sea.

This article started with a real scene, it had everything real in it and it is a very personal experience I share with you all. You can reach out to me too if you feel you want to share anything. I will listen to you in all my capacity.

Image Courtesy : Jesus Victory Centre

He Went Away…

This one is a special dedication to someone who mattered to me and will always matter to me. I was initially planning on writing about how Yoga and Music play an important role in our lives, also a special poem on Father’s Day. Then I received the news that I dreaded the most. So I decided to write this and express my emotions all at once. I think these words are what make my life easier because I write and express even those things that I cannot verbally think of expressing.

I lost someone. I came to know and in a moment everything changed. Everything seemed like a moment is all that matters. As a child, like a lot of us, my parents were working, and couldn’t afford to leave jobs. Like every parent, they took the tough decision to send me and my brother for baby-sitting. I was 8 months old and with a heavy heart, mom would drop me in the morning and pick me up later in the evening. The woman and the family who took care of me were Alsu aunty and Leo uncle.

Alsu Aunty took care of me just like one of her child. She literally did everything that a mother would do for her child. Can you imagine, someone else giving you as much love, feeding you, cleaning after you and at some point also potty train you?

In today’s world it is hard to imagine, back then angels like them existed. I would eat from their hand, stay over night too some days because I was so comfortable with them. I had my special plate in their house which was only for me. As I grew up, I started living with my brother in our house, and left Alsu aunty’s house. What didn’t leave was my love for them. I made sure to go to their house whenever I could to visit them. The entire world could go upside down, but I would ensure I visited them on my birthday, christmas, and Alsu aunty’s birthday. I made sure I never miss this.

Leo uncle would always smile, he would welcome me with all his heart, he would shout at me if I would say I’d come and then miss it by any chance. He would wait for me to come visit them. He would always tell Aunty to bring all the delicacies they made for me to taste. They would always remember my childhood days. Such a sweetheart he was and now he is gone. Just like that, he went away leaving all of us. Leaving a void but filled with so many memories that only I can see in that void.

The memories are mine. Nobody would understand the connection I have with them. To the world they are just my baby-sitters. To me they are those parents who gave their everything to me despite having their own children. I was given equal or maybe more love as their children. Now uncle has chosen to be up there and be my guiding light. I know wherever he is, he is smiling. He is blessing me with all his heart.

Tears roll out of my eyes, they also bring a smile because that’s what uncle would have wanted me to do. I am grateful to have had such happy times with them. I was always allowed to be the kiddish girl, who would just walk into that house and own it like it was hers. I was also taught such good manners. I was fed well and when I didn’t sleep when it was time to sleep I would get a shouting too. You know the most beautiful part about this? We were around 10 children, and Alsu Aunty and Leo uncle would always love each one of us. There was no favoritism. Although I believe I was their favourite child.

Ya I smiled too, because I know that’s would Leo uncle would have wanted me to do. Smile and shine. I know my Alsu aunty is strong and so am I. She raised a strong child just like herself. I will always miss Leo uncle and be grateful to him for everything that he has done for me. Thank you Leo Uncle always and forever.

Let Go !!! Hold On!!!

Letting go!! It becomes difficult to let go of things, materialistic things that we own, and now a life of our own. So easily people use the term ”Depression” these days, being completely unaware of what happens when a person is really suffering from depression.

Mental health has always been secondary or tertiary for that matter in the world we live in, despite knowing that it is mental health that needs equal importance to physical health. The stigma, the stereotype, the label that the society attaches to someone who comes open about their mental health is piqued. After a suicide case, the same society shows how they are open to mental health and its importance.

The stigma, the stereotype, the label that the society attaches to someone who comes open about their mental health is piqued.

Did it really have to be someone’s death to make us realize how critical mental health is in the current times? Did it have to be just like all other things, wait till the person suffers completely, then show a change, kind of situation? For how long will society be hypocritical about this? Does it feel any shame, guilt, a disgrace for being so inhuman towards its own kind?

It takes a lot of Empathy and a very few words to be there for someone in need. It takes a few seconds to check on someone if they are feeling fine. It takes a small effort to bring that big change. Mental health professionals are struggling to bring it’s importance to light to the society. Yet, we still see people suffer in silence, through those smiles, through those words, through those pictures and so much more.

It takes a lot of Empathy and a very few words to be there for someone in need.

There is a difference between hearing and listening, and listening is what is lacking among many of us. Listening requires that effort where you actually visualize what the person is going through while they share their ordeal. You feel a certain ache, a feeling similar to what they are feeling. I say similar cause, you won’t completely be able to feel anyone’s pain. That doesn’t mean we stop making efforts towards them.

Sometimes that small effort brings a change that often goes unnoticed by many, but the person suffering can understand. That solace that one gets by knowing someone is out there to listen to them makes that difference. In a world so self-obsessed, we don’t realize a small smile might have changed someone’s day to a great extent. All it took was eye contact and a smile. Listening to them is level two which many think is outside their capacity. I understand that and don’t blame you either for not being a listener. We often feel we have our own problems larger than others’ and at that moment if you have to give your time or smile, the thought which crosses your mind is, ” Why am I the one always giving?”

That solace that one gets by knowing someone is out there to listen to them makes that difference.

Sometimes talking to a stranger is a healing process in itself. Remember, every good relationship you have is because you gave a stranger a chance and spoke to them. Every friendship started with two strangers talking. This doesn’t mean you necessarily build a relationship with that stranger. Sometimes, strangers come in our lives when we need them the most or they need us the most and then leave. The purpose is to be a listening ear to each other.

Every friendship started with two strangers talking.

We need to give mental health the importance that we have ignored for so long. It has started showing up in ways we don’t really like. Ways which break our heart and make us regret. Look at it this way, a small child, craving for your attention will first do sweet things like they hug you, again and again, kiss you, and then when it still doesn’t get the attention, Boom!! It starts throwing things, breaks things, screams aloud, and that’s when you finally look at them.

You think why is the child misbehaving, and throwing tantrums, they even hurt you or themselves. Maybe now you regret not giving them the attention when they were at their best behavior. Let’s be there for everyone when they are at their best as well as worst. Let’s be a little more kind, a little more giving, a little more helpful. Let’s make mental health a priority, understand it, and work towards it. Maybe then, we shall celebrate more than mourn.

we shall celebrate more than mourn.

Image CourtesyDeviant Arts

In Your Dreams

Dreams play a very vivid role in our lives. They represent that part of our mind which we often suppress and let go. They bring pictures to those thoughts which can only be thought of through words. Yes, Thought through words !! Not images.

They bring pictures to those thoughts which can only be thought of through words.

I studied psychology as my Post Grad specialization. They taught us about dreams, the theories, the meanings, the inside out of it. I could only relate to it more deeply when I started experiencing it in my real life. You know they say first thing wake up in the morning and write down your dreams before you forget them? It is true, unless you have an Eidetic memory. It takes a few seconds to let go off the dream that you wanted to see, you saw and then you again let it go — Because societal norms.. !!!!!

You nodded your head didn’t you? Don’t reject it like you rejected the earlier part. I know we are allowed to have some kind of dreams and we aren’t allowed to have some kind of dreams. Really !!!!! Who decides that? The aunty who also decides your clothes are skimpy and that uncle who also decides that just because you roam with three guy friends, your probably playing around with all.

”Dreams are often most profound, when they seem the most Crazy.” Sigmund Freud

Now your furious, and you kinda want to call me a feminist who is drifting apart from the main point. No, the reason I drifted and brought this up was because until I had a conversation with my bestie about my dreams, I too had that fear. Aren’t besties the best part of our lives? Indeed.

So it took me a while to enjoy my dreams. It took me a while to ensure they became my Eidetic memory instead of an ”I don’t Remember” memory. It took me a while to accept and understand what Sigmund Freud once said about dreams. He said, ”The Virtuous Man contents himself with dreaming that which the wicked man does in actual life.”

It took me a while to ensure they became my Eidetic memory instead of an ”I don’t Remember” memory.

That look on your face, yes you may please take a moment and read it twice or thrice or as many times as required, because I am not even sharing the numbers it took me to understand.

”The Virtuous Man contents himself with dreaming that which the wicked man does in actual life.” Sigmund Freud.

Well you may agree to disagree or just agree, I leave that upto you. So over the period of years, I have started analyzing my dreams. I have started looking out for meanings in them. They seem relatable on most occasions. Sometimes, they are just about a series you are binge watching. Yes that thing happens for real.

I have read a lot of ”Psychology Says” quotes too. I know how some of them just hit you hard and some of them make you think is this really true? Well, you can only know the answer to that when you start finding meanings in them. Sometimes we see the same dream multiple times and sometimes a total random dream. Sometimes while dreaming, we already know whats going to happen and sometimes it has to startle us.

So what makes us forget them or do we do it on purpose? I noticed a pattern within me. It so happened that sometimes I didn’t want to face it with wide awake eyes and let it go, and it would still come across my mind while some totally random thought is going on already. While for others, I would remember the minutest details as well. Sometimes some dreams make us smile while others, we just wake up sad or teary eyed.

Take a moment and think about the dream you remember even today and observe what emotions you feel. It will help you understand why that dream is still so fresh in your mind. Meanwhile, I have to write about a dream I saw last night and understand what it is trying to tell me. To end this article, I just want to say that don’t reject your dreams, accept them and understand them, if not anything just write them down and later when it randomly comes to you, see how it relates to you and what is it that it has been trying to tell you about yourself.

”Dreams are as simple or as complicated as the dreamer.” Brian Herbert.

Image courtesy: Fiverr

Environment Speaks

You think someone else is saving me,
If I start to think that, you have nowhere to be.

You think you can hurt me and escape,
If I end, you have no life and no death.

You can destroy me for your selfish reasons,
And if I don’t recover, you face the treason.

You only appreciate me after a damage,
Remember even you are right now caged.

I still love you and want to give you all I have,
Save some humanity and then a smile we shall share.